Me & My Shadow

Okay, I'm the proverbial newbie in this house, and it was a hope of both Raven's & mine that our 4 cats would get along.  Well.. her boy Lego gets along w/everyone pretty much (and vice versa), but apparently Raven's other cat Selket has had some bad experiences w/black cats, so she's -hated- my guys from the start.  Since day one Selkie's growled & hissed @ my two cats upon sight.  At first my guys were just curious, coming up to her and smelling her, and occassionally trying to play.  Well that did not jibe w/Selkie, and since then Ouna's been perportedly attacking Selkie, and just lately it seems Skye's been getting in on the act, too.  

I don't know if it's a dominance thing (since my guys are both 3 and Selkie's 14), or a "fine, you don't wanna play nice, than bitch it's ON!!," but I've had to start sequestering my guys in my room, and that is -not- working out.   Why?  Well, because Skye insists on crying, whining, and scratching @ the floor & the bottom of the door- ALL.  NIGHT.  LONG.   He makes a ruckus night after night, and each day he's in my room here w/me I get progressively less and less sleep thanks to his freakout sessions.  It happens every night he's in here w/me & his sister (who does not bug out, mind you), w/o fail.  

I thought it'd be something he'd get used to over time (w/hope and any luck), but that just ain't happ'nin', and I'm getting NO SLEEP.  Raven came up w/the idea of just locking them up @ nights so the kids could still get out and play some during the day, but that doesn't help when the little man keeps me up all night crying, whining and freaking out 'cause he's suddenly in a confined space.  And I've tried food, playing w/him, placating him, distracting him.. but I gotta sleep -sometime..- -no..?

And on top of that, Raven's extremely sweet-but-not-so-bright boy (somewhat like my Skye-Bear) has some seriously deep-seated food issues, and cannot handle it- when there's cat food in the house that he can't have.  It is an everyday, all-day struggle trying to keep him out of my cat's food bowls, and as I cannot possibly be in here all day everyday watching the food for my cats, my kids are often going hungry.  He pushes the kids out of the way, or creeps up on them (and me) when no one's looking and just -devours- anything left practically standing still.  I'm sick of always having to be on the ready every second there's any food in my cats' bowls, and as I keep my guys out of Lego's food (as he has the big neverending trough at the constant ready in the kitchen), they don't try to snag from it often.  Ouna will sometimes come in and try to sneak a nibble, but if I catch her, I squirt her, too- or step-divert her, or pick her up and tell her "no.." at which point she goes away sulking, and doesn't try to come back.  But Lego's got food issues, so he's another story.  He -just, keeps, coming.-

I'd love to just have an open trough policy for all of our cats. so they could go back & for w/o problem or complaint.  But w/Ouna's past & weight she CANNOT have large piles of food made available to her all the time, (that happened @ my wonderful gramma's when I was away for 6 mos. and she gained -SCADS- of weight that I'm still struggling w/her to lose), so she and Skye-boy get 2 doses of food each day, half a cup each.  No more, no less.  But w/Lego eating everything in sight that's not nailed down Skye and Ouna are -constantly- going hungry (especially Skye, who easily gets bullied away from his food bowl), and the problem is nowhere near to being solved.   I squirt Lego, he runs.  The second my back's turned, he comes slinking back again, and has downed half the food bowl before I hear him wheezing (he has kitty asthma) and realize he's scarfing down all my cat's munchies.  By then it's too late, and if I refill the bowls he just comes right back again.  There's no learning process.  No learning curve.  Now, I can shake the water bottle and sometimes that makes Lego run away, but still- he -keeps, coming, back.-

In past I've sequestered the guys before for a week or so in hopes to get them to leave Selkie alone.. and they did- for a while.  But tonight they just went right back at it -hardcore,- gang-up-gangsta-style; (again, w/o me seeing which is TREMENDOUSLY frustrating since I can't examine the signs that way), and it was a bad enough incident that they're back in my room again- 'cause Selkie had the 'audacity' [[[sarcasm]]] to come out of Raven's room for once...  (And I mean for the first time in like.. weeks... :(((()  And it almost makes it worse that I like her "kids" and she likes both of mine.  All 4 cats are tremendously sweet, kind, gentle and loving.  But this whole hooplah just -ain't- workin' out!!

What the HELL do I do???  (Or we, the household, or whatever), 

I feel terrible about all of this...  

Selkie shouldn't have to be afraid of venturing out into her own house, where she has -every right- to be, and in a home where she was here first.  Now she doesn't leave Raven's room, and is -constantly- on edge.  And I'm fraking sick & tired of feeling like the food police, punishing Lego all the time w/water bottle squirts, and having to watch the cats' bowls all the bloody day.  I -like- him, and I don't want to see me as just The Mean Lady who Guards the Food I Ought to Have.  

I'm thinking of setting up electronic cat barriers to sequester my kids in at night to prevent Skye from freaking out and keeping me awake, and in daylight during mealtimes to prevent Lego from coming in uninvited & unanounced to feast.  But that doesn't really solve the problem.  You know?  So what in the HELL can I and/or my household possibly do to remedy these two situations??  They're both 24 hour, 7-days-a-week, 365 days-a-year, 'round the clock vigils:  One to make sure that my guys and Selkie don't get into a bloody battle royale, and two to make sure that Skye and Ouna actually -get- to the food I'm feeding them.  

Selkie deserves to live in a calm and happy, peaceful home.  
And secondary to that, my kids need to get the food that they get each day.  

What the fuck could be causing all this mess.. and how in FUCK do we fix it???

Many thanks for any help or advice you may be able to offer.
♥ ♥ ♥
Nae

Like litterally.. Skye went after 'em while I was opening the can, so I gave him a nip of one, figgering he'd go "oh, 's a veggie.. ne'er mind." But then 'e tried to get 'em while I was eating them cooked... And after I gave him a scrap of one of those, he kept after them! O.O My cat is SO weird!!

..And when they were done, he put his face INTO my bowl and started lapping up the juice..! *shakes head*
French-cut, canned green beans.. w/no butter, no salt, no nothin... :P
No joke.. I gots me a weeeeeiiird kitty! ;)